Shannon Cornuke went on a mission trip to Guatemala thinking she had life figured out. She knew Jesus died for her, but she didn’t really know Jesus and didn’t have a reason to need to know Him. Through the people she met, Shannon fully realized God’s love for the first time—and got to share it with everyone around her.
All my life I thought I was on the right track. I thought I could control my life. I knew Jesus died for me, but I didn’t strive to know anything else—like knowing Him.
I thought I could go along with my life and look to God when I wanted to, or when He was not blessing me.
I thought I could get by without a relationship with Him.
I thought that I could connect with Him on Sunday, and put Him aside during the week.
I thought that He was just there when it was convenient for me.
I thought He was only there to complain to.
I thought He was there to consult to my needs.
But I never thought was that I would truly find God and begin a relationship with Him while on a mission trip to Guatemala.
*Photo by Connie Rock
Because had been volunteering at a hospital in the states for a couple months, when I went to the cerebral palsy hospital in Antigua, I thought I could just walk in and everything would be fine. I felt like I would be the one that had more experience than the others in my group.
I thought I had everything under control, and that I would change these people’s lives.
Then I was led into a hot, sunny room with old ladies lined up against the wall in wheelchairs, unable to move.
I looked around and the nervous awkwardness hit me. I couldn’t do this.
Before the trip, I was struggling. Everyone has struggles… and mine was with loneliness. For the longest time I felt alone, useless, and hopeless. Because of this loneliness and longing, I shut God out, and replaced Him with other things. The sad thing is that I didn’t even know that I was shutting Him out. It just happened.
God led me to an old, shriveled lady in a wheelchair. She grasped my hand and didn’t let go. She held my hand so tight that I didn’t know what to do. She started to sob. She talked about her sister and daughter dying, and other things I could not translate. I connected with this old lady in a way I never thought was possible. I felt her loneliness… and her pain.
God hit my heart with a hammer, and left a crack in it.
When she stared into my eyes, I saw God’s love. I saw his longing for me. I saw his love for her. He gave me love and compassion for this woman that I have never felt for any other person in my life. I broke down crying. I sat with her for 45 minutes, not daring to move. Not daring to break our connection.
On this day, God told me, “You are not alone.”
The next couple days he left more chips and cracks in my heart. He showed me joy, peace, compassion, grace, beauty, pain, suffering, poverty and His everlasting love. Each day was an emotional, unforgettable impact on my life.
One night, we were worshiping, and reflecting on the week, and it happened.
He hit my heart so hard that it broke into a million pieces.
I felt my loneliness, anger, bitterness, sadness, and fear fly away. God consumed the empty space and patched up my heart.
I felt freedom for the first time in my life.
It is something that is unexplainable. I broke down crying. A fire was started in my soul. My heart was made new. I never knew that I could feel freedom. I never thought that I could ever connect with God. But I did.
The day after I truly accepted Jesus, and His freedom, our group went and did an Ask The Lord prayer time. He kept giving me images of the place where I received my first crack: The Cerebral-Palsy Hospital. I knew that is where God wanted me to go. So I listened, and went.
I walked into the hospital feeling different. I didn’t feel alone anymore. I felt free, and ready to share that freedom and love with anyone I laid eyes on.
We walked into a room filled with boys in wheelchairs staring blankly at a screen with Asian images flashing by. We turned off the T.V, opened a parachute, blew up balloons and beach balls, and started waving the parachute up and down. We put the boy’s wheelchairs in a circle and let them in on the fun.
The joy they showed me was amazing, and to no surprise, I started to cry tears of love for these boys. When they were happily playing, I went and prayed for the sick boys in bed with another member of my group.
Yet while I was busy playing and praying and doing work, I kept seeing this boy facing the wall, lying on a bench in the corner.
God said, “Go to him.” So I went.
When I sat down and laid a hand on his back, he immediately sat up and looked at me. His look of sadness, worthlessness, and loneliness consumed my soul. I grabbed his hands, rubbed his back, talked to him, sang to him, and prayed over him. He enjoyed it all, yet he kept looking and pointing at the parachute. He couldn’t go to it, because all the wheelchairs were occupied. So I decided to bring the parachute to him.
I gave him the handle, threw the ball in the middle, and we had our own personal parachute session. I glanced over at him. As I did, he looked up and flashed me the most amazing smile as light flooded his eyes. I cried. He kissed my hands, smiled, and laughed. It was amazing to be able to experience belonging with this boy.
We were both alone, but the love of God gave us freedom. I got to feel free with this precious boy. This boy who couldn’t speak and whom I couldn’t communicate with, in Guatemala, in a small, run-down hospital that nobody seemed to care about. Yet God cares.
Even in the smallest places, He can shine His light.
Freedom is meant to be shared; and I got to share it with this beautiful boy.
To society, this boy and I are seen as useless. But to God, we are more precious than anything.
I thought I knew God before this trip. I was just a prisoner who escaped the shackles on the wall, but who was still in the cell. But thanks to God’s love, and His son Jesus, I escaped the cell and got to run into His arms.
I am free.
Do you feel God calling you to serve Him in Guatemala? CLICK HERE for youth group trips, HERE for student trips, and HERE for adult trips!
