Karson Wilkins just returned from a Passport trip to Albania, where she spent two months living life to the fullest while serving God with all of her heart. Now she’s back and life isn’t the same anymore—because she isn’t the same either.
Now she faces a decision: does she go back to mediocre religion…or does she continue to pursue intimacy with God?
“How are you?” seems to be the number one question asked ever since I came home from my time in Albania. I usually answer with the proper phrase that Albanians who spoke English were taught to say:
“I’m fine, thanks.”
Honesty time: I’m not fine. I’m broken and sad. I miss my team. I miss the relationships I cultivated while on the field. I miss the ignorance and apathy I lived in comfortably (yeah, I know that that’s not the best thing to miss).
I feel like I have just gone through a breakup or lost a close friend (I might be a little dramatic).
While on the field, I experienced some of the hardest lessons I have ever learned. And they were beautiful.
Before my trip, I thought I understood what daily ministry was like and what missionaries went through. I was so incredibly wrong.
I could have never learned the things God taught me these past two months through a sermon or someone else’s testimony. I had to experience them for myself. The experiences Jesus gave me showed me just how little I knew and know about God and ministry.
I’m honestly upset at these two months. Why? Because God just waltzed right into my comfortable life, wrecked my plans, and lit a burning desire in me so consumingly bright, that I will not be able to ever return to my apathetic Christianity and be satisfied with it.
My new desire for Him is like a wildfire that I can’t quench or tame. I’m upset because God is calling me and I want to answer so badly. . . But if I do, I know I will never be the same. And that’s terrifying.
So here’s where I have to make the decision: Do I go back to my everyday life and quiet the longing for God in my heart? Or do I let this new fire consume me and follow passionately after Christ?
Do I go back to mediocre religion or do I pursue intimacy with God?
Please pray for me as I make this decision as I pray for God to put the same desires in you!
Does Karson’s description of the life she’s found in Christ stir something in you? Is God calling you deeper into relationship with Him?
Passport trips are a chance for college students to deepen their relationships with Christ through discipleship, serving others, and living in authentic community. CLICK HERE for 2017 Passport trips to Central and South America, Europe, Africa, and Asia!
